Attention VH1: I want the Tweet and Amil reality show where they work together at the Atlantic Center Target and I want it Right Now!

Coming this fall, relevance comes at a discount

Coming this fall, relevance comes at a discount

T-boz has a show, Tia and Tamara Mowry have a show, Toni Braxton’s goddamn family has a show. Why hasn’t VH1 gotten off their ass and created a show where Amil and Tweet work together at the Atlantic Center Target in Brooklyn, NY. Here are just a few of the “so easy they write themselves” aspects of the show.

Possible Titles
Oops, there goes my career
Can I Get a… Job at Target
Who Are You Again?
Target Market

Possible Scenes
While filling out the application on the in-store computers, Amil writes down Mephis Bleek’s name under references. She looks up his email in her phone, we find out that it’s memphis@onehitaway.com. She stares at it for a minute, then deletes it and puts down Jaz-O instead.

Olivia calls up the girls to see if they want to transfer to the College Point Target. Neither girl answers her call.

While Tweet is working the fitting room counter she jokingly says to a customer trying on a pullover Oops, there goes your shirt.” She laughs hysterically. The woman she’s talking to doesn’t get it and stares at her blankly and then replies, “So, yeah, I’m just trying on the pullover”. Tweet composes herself and shamefully hands her a “1” tag.

Both of them planting their solo albums in with the other CDs.

While on a break Amil asks Tweet when was the last time she heard from Missy. Tweet stares at her for a minute and then the two simultaneously burst out laughing. Tweet then yanks the weave off of Amil’s head.

Blu Cantrell is their manager and is constantly yelling at them.

In an act of defiance against Jay-Z, Amil performs in front of the Barclay Center. She then unknowingly becomes part of an impromptu “Harlem Shake” video. Blu comes out and tells her to get back to work.

 

You can contact me at jayabbondanza.com to negotiate my fee.

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