Hypothetical Question – Political Trance

When in the course of human events.... You are feeling very sleepy...

When in the course of human events…. You are feeling very sleepy…

Are attempts to speak to me about politics and history a plot to lull me into a trance like state so that you can take my wallet?

Every now and again while in the midst of rambling about Mad Men, opinions about superhero movie casting decisions, and why aren’t more people watching Treme, Girls, and Shameless topics of my conversations stray unconfidently and awkwardly into the realm of politics. The conversation has no idea how it got there and is unsure what to do, how to act, and who’s going to hurt it, but unfortunately it stumbled into that forest and forgot to leave pebbles on its path in order to show it the way back to pointing out the benefits of Limp Bizkit. This dank and ominous forest is inhabited by an evil witch able to take on different forms, but most commonly personified by an older man with a greying beard armed with actual knowledge and a differing opinion to whatever nonsense I just spewed forth from my face. I don’t trust this man and I question his motives.

Anyone who has heard me talk about how I came to understand the plight of New Orleans through the HBO Series Treme should be able to understand that they are dealing with a being of lower cultural understanding if not outright intelligence. Therefore why would they waste their time educating me about whatever stupid thing I said about what Obama “should do”? There must be more to the story.

With that in mind, are they attempting to lull me into a trance or is it something else?

When someone speaks to me about politics without referencing something specific that I saw on an online clip of the Daily Show or an episode Veep. My consciousness actually enters an autopilot like state. I am able to recognize people leaving and the mouth of the person speaking, but the only information that is accepted is the cue that I am allowed to speak again. I only take in the physical clues to speak so that I am able to semi-gracefully state, “well, that’s something” and then run away. However, with every non Veep/Daily Show reference that is made, my consciousness strays further from my body. Phrases like “when Congress”, “well, actually”, and “in 19(whatever)” sends signals to my consciousness to go on a break because it’s going to be a while.

I remember once, a discussion over a diplomatic solution to the situation with Cuba led to a weeklong trance. I attempted to get out of it early on in the proceedings, but I was unable to make the Godfather 2 reference quick enough. The next thing I knew I was staring at a picture of myself on a “missing” poster in downtown Madison, Wisconsin. People were worried.

Is this the plan? Luckily, to my knowledge I have not been taken advantage of yet, but it must be coming. There, but for the grace of god go I once discussion of Supreme Court proceedings proceed. No one brings up amendments in the 20’s with me unless they have some sort of ulterior motive.

Something Else
If they aren’t trying to take my wallet then there are a limited number of options left. The reasons that come to mind are as follows: they want to feel superior to someone, they are working on their doctoral thesis about the effect of boredom on loudmouths, or they actually want to educate. The option of wanting to engage in a spirited round of political discourse has been eliminated due to the disparity of intelligence between the combatants and the unlikeliness that anything intelligent could follow the phrase, “did you see the latest Riff Raff video on YouTube.”

Well, I think they’re trying to get my wallet. What do you think?

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